7月17日雅思大作文示范写作 | 广告意在推销非必需品吗?
应对
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
这个题目
这句话的主要(也许不限于呢。。。)问题如下：
Ø For failed children accepting parents’ views of hard work 挺让人费解的。究竟是 failed 与 accepting parents’ views of hard work 同时作为 children 的定语，一个前置(就是放在名词的前面啦)一个后置(就是放在名词的后面啦)，还是 accepting parents’ views of hard work 是 failed children 的行为哈?
Ø views of hard work的意思是“对于努力的看法”么?还是其实views的内容是要work hard呢?
Ø blindly develop a hatred of injustice 挺吓人的。blindly有点严重，hatred也是一个强烈的词，injustice也很“厉害”呀!!
Ø 句子前面的部分中对于children的情况的描述好像和后面的主句之间的逻辑关系，挺难让人理解其中奥妙的。。。
教师修改/改写后的句子：
句子解析：
Ø 句子中的因果之间的联系，更密切更顺畅易懂，因为原因和结果的具体内容之间的联系了呢。
Ø lose the election (原作者这位烤鸭的举例讲到竞选班长)替换原来的failed。
Ø defeated 的一个释义是“泄气的”，此处用到，是不是。同时注意斜杠后的替换词 dispirited。
Ø right 有副词的用法的哟。
Ø fail 这个动词，蛮好的。
小总结：
句子的各个部分之间的逻辑关系很重要，通常通过内容的合理组织来实现逻辑的流畅。
用词讲究“度”。
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7月17日雅思大作文示范写作 | 广告意在推销非必需品吗?
年7月17雅思大作文题目
Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve the sales of products that people do not really need.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
范文及解析
Introduction
Advertising has been an integral part of our economic and social life now. However, as a powerful technique of promoting sales, it has been censured by some people for its “main aim”: to encourage shoppers to buy unnecessary goods. I tend to think that this view presents a very one-sided picture of advertising.
【解析】
integral part 不可或缺的部分
censure 谴责v.
one-sided 片面的adj.
Body Paragraph 1
The commentary is understandable that advertising creates unconscious desires. People holding this view may ascribe their over-consumption to advertisers’ exaggerated claims of their marketing pitches, which means advertising puts goods in a positive light, creating unrealistic expectations, all for the benefit of selling. Enticed by these messages, consumers would buy goods of little or no value to themselves on impulse, be it a new cell phone or a massage armchair.
【解析】
ascribe … to … 归咎于
marketing pitch 市场营销
entice 怂恿 v.
on impulse 一时冲动
Body Paragraph 2
To persuade potential customers through evoking their psychological appeals, indeed, is one objective of advertising. However, I would argue that there is a controversy in what constitutes necessities versus non-essentials. This ambiguous notion is changing, along with the change in generations. To explain, what seems nonessential now – a massage armchair, for example – may fulfill its function years later, whereas what seems required now – a cell phone, for example – may soon lose its value if operating systems suddenly upgrade.
【解析】
evoke 唤醒 v.
psychological appeals
controversy 争议 n.
Body Paragraph 3
My firm conviction is that the real objective of advertising is to promote effective communication between producers and consumers. When a new product is to be introduced in the market, producers create memorable advertising campaigns that boost brans recognition, from which potential customers can be informed more about product advantages and know what suits their requirements and budget. Not only that, advertising helps maintain the demand for existing products and services.
【解析】
introduce 引入v.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I would say that the main aim of advertising is to prepare a ground for the sales of products, but we cannot affirm that the promoted goods are unnecessary.
【解析】
prepare a ground for 为…打基础
affirm 断言v.
