7月17日雅思大作文示范写作 | 广告意在推销非必需品吗?
应对
Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment.Why is this happening?
What measures can be taken to tackle this problem?
这个题目。
学生写了下面这个句子(在作文的Introduction处)：
When people break the laws and get caught, they will face relevant penalty.
看起来通顺?是的。读起来通顺?没有不通顺。那有什么问题?问题如下：
首先，两个细节问题：
* break the law而不是laws，没有s才对。
* penalty可数于是应该是penalties。
其次，
* 一个意思简单信息量并不丰富的句子其实没有必要再用“状语从句+主句”的方式来写。其实，读起来拖沓。
并且，
* face relevant penalty读起来就感觉生硬呢。
* relevant其实没有必要，感人感觉，作者在强调“是对应的惩罚哟，没有乱责罚哟”。
看下面
教师修改后的句子：
The penalty for their criminal conduct may be less deterrent than it should be.
*不用定语从句修饰penalty，一是更符合习惯用法a/the penalty for something;二是避免了动词就避免了时态语态错误的可能。
* 原本由compared with构建的比较换成由than构建的比较级。
* deterrent这个词的意思是“有威慑(力)的”，是不是意思更具体更有细节?当然是的词汇选择。
小总结：
* 用语细节的错误，见功力，考官可不会跟我们客气，小错误不会就这么算了的。
* 信息简单的句子，能简洁就不要繁琐，no作no die。
* 形容词可能带有性质性的说明甚至程度的强调，当我们没有强调事物的性质的时候，慎用或者干脆不用呗，少个没必要的形容词不可惜。
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雅思阅读的学习方法
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课程整体介绍
01
02
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04
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阅读知识点
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口语知识点
写作知识点
核心词汇拓展
相关题型分类练习
英语听力
听力常作为一种考试题型，目的在于考察应试者对英语语言的把握，考察考生对英语日常交流的理解能力;通常有听对话选择答案、听句子默写关键字词几种形式。
英语写作
通过本课程的系统学习，每位学生能写出内容充实，在此基础上，掌握撰写毕业论文的基本技能。要熟练掌握提纲及提要和读书报告的撰写技巧，写作速度大约平均在每小时200-300词。
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（3）课后完成多样化作业并进行学术测试，班主任线上线下24小时答疑
7月17日雅思大作文示范写作 | 广告意在推销非必需品吗?
年7月17雅思大作文题目
Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve the sales of products that people do not really need.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
范文及解析
Introduction
Advertising has been an integral part of our economic and social life now. However, as a powerful technique of promoting sales, it has been censured by some people for its “main aim”: to encourage shoppers to buy unnecessary goods. I tend to think that this view presents a very one-sided picture of advertising.
【解析】
integral part 不可或缺的部分
censure 谴责v.
one-sided 片面的adj.
Body Paragraph 1
The commentary is understandable that advertising creates unconscious desires. People holding this view may ascribe their over-consumption to advertisers’ exaggerated claims of their marketing pitches, which means advertising puts goods in a positive light, creating unrealistic expectations, all for the benefit of selling. Enticed by these messages, consumers would buy goods of little or no value to themselves on impulse, be it a new cell phone or a massage armchair.
【解析】
ascribe … to … 归咎于
marketing pitch 市场营销
entice 怂恿 v.
on impulse 一时冲动
Body Paragraph 2
To persuade potential customers through evoking their psychological appeals, indeed, is one objective of advertising. However, I would argue that there is a controversy in what constitutes necessities versus non-essentials. This ambiguous notion is changing, along with the change in generations. To explain, what seems nonessential now – a massage armchair, for example – may fulfill its function years later, whereas what seems required now – a cell phone, for example – may soon lose its value if operating systems suddenly upgrade.
【解析】
evoke 唤醒 v.
psychological appeals
controversy 争议 n.
Body Paragraph 3
My firm conviction is that the real objective of advertising is to promote effective communication between producers and consumers. When a new product is to be introduced in the market, producers create memorable advertising campaigns that boost brans recognition, from which potential customers can be informed more about product advantages and know what suits their requirements and budget. Not only that, advertising helps maintain the demand for existing products and services.
【解析】
introduce 引入v.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I would say that the main aim of advertising is to prepare a ground for the sales of products, but we cannot affirm that the promoted goods are unnecessary.
【解析】
prepare a ground for 为…打基础
affirm 断言v.
